Dear Dark Stranger

Dear Dark Stranger,

We met but scattered moments and I instantly knew you were going to play a much more significant part in my life than I had hoped you would. Do not mistake this words for a mere personal vanity, but simply as an assessment of feelings ahead that should be trimmed down and put aside for the progression of our course. You represent everything I had wished I could avoid in coming back to my native land. However the carefree branch of your thoughts and actions, I must admit I found a great difficulty in accepting such an overwhelming idealism from a person who seeks to avoid so many experiences in life. You are swarmed by a light glow of darkness, an image which makes your sensitivity all the more appealing to my cynical views. No such words are to be uttered in public, as we are both very much aware that the situation cannot be helped, as it is not of a mutual point of view. I am sure that by now, you probably do not comprehend a word of what I so bashfully express on paper, but I shall try to be clearer; having battled with my mind and my heart, I have come to the conclusion that you could potentially make me fall…into an unwanted passionate love. This is not something I gracefully pursue, especially at this point in my life, as indeed life’s thrown me in a crossroads and being focussed on my future plans is of the utmost importance to me. Every person in their life is encircled by two things; their needs and their wants. I am your former in this instance. It is a great pity that most people do not take any great interest in their needs but instead they seek so passionately for their wants, which ultimately leads them to a dead-end. For me, unfortunately you are the latter. A want I cannot pursue at this point in my life, as indeed I embody vanity at this stage, since I am in search for professional progression. You, my dark stranger, embody a want I simply cannot pursue given my current situation. You are potentially everything I have so longed for, but which unfortunately arrived too little too late. A potentially great love that arrived at the wrong time, in the wrong place. My intentions are to keep things between us as is; be merely pleasant acquaintances and avoid any contraction of emotional interchange, as that would make matters all the more difficult and unpleasant for both parties. Indeed, in another world, we potentially might have been the mythic embodiment of a great long mad affair. We do know though, how myths turn out in this world¬; unwanted and filled with hatred for their “glorified” imagination. Such are the feelings battling inside me this period. No matter how much I long for attention and a sip of your lust to be directed to me, no matter if in my heart I know that what you require is patience and understanding, something which I could so willingly offer under different circumstances of course, no matter if you might be the single person in this god forsaken place who can make me believe again into something beautiful, even though all this can happen in a potential union of us, things will never unfold the way we hoped them to. That is our greatest tragedy; the possibility to live something so breathtakingly glorious but which will never happen because of human vanity and unnatural fear of jumping off the cliff called unknown.