Three years ago...

What is the driving force that leads people to fall in love, and always fall for the most unsuitable persons? I’ve often found myself in such a situation without knowing or fully understanding why that is. I guess I’m always hoping for the all time love like some people do and along the way I get carried away by the light air of love, the beautiful thought of being in love and aching for someone who deep down I know it is not the all time love, but is the good enough of right now. That is because as you watch your life pass you by, you settle and go for the one-night-stand-good-enough’s and simply convince yourself that the good enough of right now is ultimately the all time love, because as it is often said good enough is as good enough you will get in this life and life should be filled with actions instead of endless awaits for the ultimate, the perfect and ultimately the all time love.

Late at nights though, thoughts haunt me knowing how cynic our world has become. So much, that we’ve literally stopped believing; not in religion or to some higher authority that controls our lives, but instead we’ve stopped believing in ourselves, in the power of greatness. We see each other as game toys, or even revenge toys that you can canalize your unfulfilled desires, scattering that way a mass chaos which leads only to the so called psychotherapy of everyone on this planet. We simply forget to question why exactly were we put on this planet, why were we made the way we are, why were we made to procreate and survive? Was humanity ultimately to end up the way it has and how proud are we for all that we have done so far? So proud indeed so as to kill each other, betray, steal, cheat, leave people barring colour or shape to rot. We extol writers, singers, poets and actors for trying to open the eyes of the people in what is really going on around them and that they should act against the rottenness and the misery that we spread daily in our path without even realizing it. It is indeed stupid to think that some poor lines are going to move the common people. A fine reason for people to become cynics against life, and just compromise with all its ugliness and its corruption, drugging though more people with they, usually their offspring.

Therefore with all these, how can a feeling that was defined by people survive through this corruption? How can the feeling we named ‘love’ survive and change humanity? Was it deliberately discovered or defined just to make people search for something that could not and still cannot be found and to keep people alert, or was it simply an impulse, a spontaneous thing that humans defined to explain the way we mate and procreate? Can we be considered as ignorant as the ancient Greeks were, when they gave a name for everything that could not comprehend or explain? Did we do the same thing? Are we all just pawns of humanity’s ignorance? If we really sit down and analyze it though, we are bound to discover that love has nothing to do with mating or procreating, and that we might indeed fulfil that saying that ‘ignorance is bliss’. The only thing that is amiss with this saying though, is that we have turned this ignorance into something spiteful, full of adversity and misery. We have turned our mating and procreating habits to things that can only be accepted if the feeling ‘love’ has only to do something with it. We have though, in later years, defined mating habits with other words such as ‘passion’ or ‘desire’ or ‘lust’ so that we can escape the word ‘love’ and to justify to human society the prime instincts of mating with a suppose urge which cannot be avoided when two humans have sexual attraction, ‘making love’ as it is most gently placed in words by humans, so that we can again avoid words that might reveal that indeed mating is animalistic. Animalistic as mating can be considered though, we cannot entirely exclude the fact that it cannot be made with tenderness or with a more gentle way. Of course mating will always be violent at some extent in order to be enjoyed and give pleasure to humans, but it can also provide warmness before or after the sexual mating of two humans.

And what made me develop a theory that negates and nullifies the word ‘love’ that explains all the emotions that people feel for another human being? Simply because I’ve come to realize quite recently that if we do accept the term ‘love’ we are indeed compromising with life’s conventions and that we might be letting ourselves falling into a trap that our ancestors have placed noiselessly upon the later generations, that’s us as well, in order to explain or even to contain people from ‘humping’ one another impudently. Therefore, how much can we trust the word ‘love’ and should we indeed compromise with the term for the rest of our lives, leading most of humanity in this endless search of the one person who can personify the word ‘love’? I wouldn’t if I were in you. I deny shamelessly the word ‘love’ and cease this endless search that I was taught to do since the dawn of my life.

Written
12/07/2006